Stephy’s Place: Where Grief Finds Comfort and Connection

Grief is one of life’s most challenging journeys, and yet, so many of us feel like we have to walk it alone. The world keeps moving, but for those who have lost a loved one, everything has changed. What if grief didn’t have to feel so isolating?  

In this episode of Comforting Closure - Conversations with a Death Doula, I sit down with Sheila Martello, the founder of Stephy’s Place, a nonprofit grief support center offering free, peer-led support groups for those navigating loss.   

Why Peer Support Matters in Grief  

Sheila knows firsthand how life can change in an instant. After losing her husband in the 9/11 attacks, she was suddenly a young widow with two small children, struggling to find her way through loss. At first, she resisted joining a support group, but something shifted when she finally walked through the doors.  

She found comfort in simply sitting with others who understood—there was no need to explain or pretend she was "okay."  

That experience led her to create Stephy’s Place, where people grieving all kinds of loss can come together and support one another. Unlike traditional counseling, peer-led groups provide:  

• A sense of belonging – Grief is less overwhelming when shared with those who understand.  

• A judgment-free space – There’s no “right” way to grieve and no rush to “move on.”  

• Support without pressure – You don’t have to talk. Sometimes, just being in the room is enough.  

What We Get Wrong About Grief  

Grief is deeply personal, yet society often tells us how we should be grieving. Sheila and I talk about some of the biggest myths, like:  

• "You should be over it by now." – There’s no timeline for grief. It doesn’t expire.  

• "Talking about your loved one will make things worse." – In reality, hearing their name and sharing memories can be comforting.  

• "You're grieving the wrong way." – No two grief journeys are alike. What works for one person may not work for another. 

Instead of trying to “fix” grief, we need to create space for it—to honor the love that still exists even after loss.  

How We Can Do Better  

One of the hardest parts of grieving is feeling like the world wants you to move on before you're ready. Workplaces offer just a few days of bereavement leave. Friends stop checking in. People avoid saying your loved one’s name out of fear of upsetting you.  

So, how can we do better?  

• Ask instead of assuming – A simple “How are you holding up?” can mean so much.  

• Say their name – Talking about someone who has passed keeps their memory alive.  

• Acknowledge that grief doesn’t have a timeline – No one “gets over” a loss; they learn to carry it differently.  

  
  

You Are Not Alone  

If you’re grieving, please know this: you don’t have to do it alone. There are people who understand, who will sit with you in your grief without trying to fix it. Stephy’s Place is one of those spaces, and if you need support, they are here for you.  

Learn more about Stephy’s Place: https://www.stephysplace.org  

Support Stephy’s Place: https://www.stephysplace.org/donate